God speaks...

The most unbelievable thing happened to me today. Clearly, this is my first post of the month, given that school has begun... and let's not talk about how that is going.

I came home today off the charts discouraged... I feel as that since this has gotten started, I have been teetering on the brink of a breakdown, but I have realized I don't have the time to breakdown. Thus, I'm holding it together by a thread...

Then something happened today to remind me that KARA isn't the one holding it together by a thread... rather, KARA is the reason there's only a thread left. It's because of my Savior that I haven't fell apart, and it's because of Him that I'm not laying in the fetal position in the corner of my room. As my health insists on deteriorating, it continues to take what little cognitive reasoning and energy I have left. I'm certainly not pulling the victim card, we all have our issues to deal with, but I'd be lying if I said I wasn't discouraged.

Gramma Ruthie sent me the devotional "Streams in the Dessert" several months ago. I would love to say I read it daily, but I don't... however, I did read it today. Not in the morning like I usually do, but this afternoon after I got home. The devotion for July 19 is as follows...

"Shall I not drink the cup the Father has given me?" -John !8:11
To "drink the cup" was a greater thing than calming the sea or raising the dead. The prophets and apostles could do amazing miracles, but they did not always do the will of God and thereby suffered as a result. Doing God's will and thus experiencing suffering is still the highest form of faith, and the most glorious Christian achievement.
Having your brightest aspirations as a young person forever crushed; bearing burdens daily that are always difficult, and never seeing relief; finding yourself worn down by poverty while simply desiring to do good for others and provide a comfortable living for those you love; being shackled by an incurable physical disability; being completely alone, separated from all those you love, to face the trauma of life alone; yet in all these, still being able to say through such a difficult school of discipline, "Shall I not drink the cup the Father has given me?" - this is faith at its highest, and spiritual success at its crowning point. Great faith is exhibited not so much in doing as in suffering.
In order to have a sympathetic God, we must have a suffering Savior, for true sympathy comes from understanding another person's hurt by suffering the same affliction. Therefore we cannot help others who suffer without paying a price ourselves, because afflictions are the cost we pay for our ability to sympathize. Those who wish to help others must first suffer. If we wish to rescue others, we must be willing to face the cross; experiencing the greatest happiness in life through ministering to others is impossible without drinking the cup Jesus drank and without submitting to the baptism He endured.
If you have surrendered yourself to Christ, your present circumstances that seem to be pressing so hard against you are the perfect tool in the Father's hand to chisel you into shape for eternity. So trust Him and never push away the instrument He is using or you will miss the result of His work in your life.
The school of suffering graduates exceptional scholars.